Like many of my friends, I have spent 30+ years volunteering my time, skills, and heart in service to a hobby community I believed in. I stepped up because I want to support my community with my time and skills. Because I wanted to work as part of a team. Because I saw what was possible when passionate, generous people work together. 

But recent events have deeply shaken that foundation.

I was unexpectedly removed from my volunteer leadership role without any prior notice of issues, without discussion, and without any opportunity to respond to concerns. The reasons cited in the removal email were very vague and confusing. I still want to learn what mistake I may have made and to whom I could make an apology. 

I followed every official path (and some unofficial) available to me in an effort to understand what had happened. I wrote many respectful, detailed letters to leaders up and down the chain of command. I requested clarification. I asked for dialogue. I offered over 50 pages of documentation. I filed an appeal. I requested a formal investigation in two venues to uncover the truth.

In return, I was met with silence, dismissal, or rejection at every turn.

This experience has taken an enormous emotional toll.

But in the end, I realized this is not just about me. This is about precedent and the chilling effect it creates for others who are serving, or considering stepping up to serve. When due process is bypassed, when transparency is abandoned, when respectful dialogue is denied, it becomes harder for anyone to volunteer in good faith—especially in roles where tough decisions are required or where leadership visibility makes one a target for criticism.

And yet, I am not writing this to discourage volunteering. Far from it.

I believe deeply in volunteer service. Let us all be inspired by Jimmy Carter. I still believe that our communities can only thrive when good people show up, give generously, and take on the hard work of building something together. But I also believe that volunteers deserve a system of support and need to know the risks they may face. In this one role, I was not aware of all the risks I took on when I began. I had no idea this scenario could happen.

In the midst of all this, I do want to acknowledge one man—he knows who he is—who chose to listen. Though he held zero power to change what was happening, he offered something I needed most: compassion. He heard me. He spoke to me as a fellow human being. He didn’t deflect or dismiss. And while that didn’t alter the outcome, it reminded me that empathy still exists in this space, and that simple human decency can be helpful even when systems fail.

So I offer this reflection to those still serving or considering stepping forward:

Volunteer with Awareness – Look Before You Leap

Go in with open eyes. Volunteer with hope, yes—but also with awareness. Before you accept a position, especially one of leadership, ask the hard questions: 

What kind of support will I receive if challenges arise? 

Who has the authority to remove me, and what process will be followed? 

What regulations are they accountable to? 

Is there a clear path for communication, mediation, or appeal if misunderstandings occur? 

Are there documented policies in place to ensure fair treatment of all parties? 

How have those policies been implemented in the past? 

Are these policies enforced by consistent staff members?

Understand how conflicts are handled. Seek to understand whether your organization has systems for conflict resolution, whether investigations are governed by clear rules, and whether those rules are applied consistently. Ask who decides when an investigation begins—and whether the subject of that investigation will be notified or interviewed. 

Know what protections are in place for you—and where the gaps are. In many volunteer organizations, especially ones that run on goodwill and tradition, due process is informal at best. That doesn’t mean we should accept that. We must demand better—not just for ourselves, but for the health of the community as a whole. That may mean editing governing documents.

Build networks of mutual support. Find people you trust and invest in those relationships. Create informal support structures among your fellow volunteers so that if things go wrong, you don’t have to face it alone.

Advocate for clearer policies and more transparent processes. If you see something that seems vague, inconsistent, or unfair—speak up. Don’t wait until it happens to you or someone close to you. Policy is often shaped in the aftermath of harm, but it doesn’t have to be. You can help shape it now, before more harm is done.

And if you see someone being shut out unfairly—speak up. Even if you can’t change the outcome, your voice matters. Silence reinforces the harm. Compassion and courage disrupt it. One person reaching out can make the difference between someone feeling abandoned and someone feeling seen. Write letters. Have conversations. Set aside time to do it.

I am taking new training to ensure that groups I manage will get the best service I can provide. I manage theater groups, music groups, and women’s support groups. The lessons I learned from the past few months will fuel my leadership decisions in the future. 

Be careful out there. Know the risks before you take on responsibility. Look for accountability, transparency, and honesty when you choose where to invest your volunteer time.

PLEASE READ MORE! EDUCATE YOURSELF!

For additional information, please watch my class recording from a volunteer education program I have volunteered for in the past on the topic of Conflict Resolution: https://youtu.be/1BI38cQtwUM?si=Q_aGd6sqCfCLmsfr 

Also please read about the Chicago Theater Standards that were developed for theater communities to use consistent standards for conflict resolution. https://ut.uchicago.edu/about/cts and https://notinourhouseorg.wordpress.com/ 

Please read two great books from Dr. Paul Marciano who generously took the time to consult with me on this latest problem. Dr. Paul Marciano is the leading authority on employee engagement and respect in the workplace. https://paulmarciano.com/ 

Finally, please explore the many videos and articles on the Conscious Leadership Group website. https://conscious.is/